Have you ever wondered why some people can never seem to be able to give you a direct answer to any question? How no matter how direct the question is their replies always start with “it depends……”
I was in class a few weeks back and my lecturer asked a question that generated a variety of answers because everybody had a different point of view. Then he swerved off topic and asked us the very same question I just asked. Adding that if you show somebody a blue marker and ask what color it was what would you expect the person to say? Then somebody said “it depends…the person being asked could be color blind”
Here’s where things got interesting, he now asked us guys if someone asked us if we were in a relationship what would we say.
“Well….it depends on who is asking. If its Dangote’s daughter then I’m very much single and ready to mingle” After all who wouldn’t want to be Aliko Dangote’s son-in-law? An opportunity not to be passed on lightly.
It’s like as we grew older yes and no became less and less used options when we answer questions. And even when the questions aren’t “yes or no” questions we still cannot provide direct answers. Ask the average politician a straightforward question and I bet you they cannot answer you directly.
Fortunately for me, I’m single so yeah if I happen to run into Dangote’s daughter (as unlikely as that would be) my answer won’t depend on anything.
I finally caught the “Hello” fever. Not the #HelloChallenge one (though I tried that with a few zero-chill girlfriends who quickly put me in my place). The fever I’m referring to is the feelings generated by that song. I read somewhere about a poll that indicated a large percentage of women were encouraged to renew/resurrect previously dead relationships because of that song. Well, the fever didn’t catch me that bad but it did put things into perspective for me.
For one I find it very very interesting that what essentially amounted to a four minutes 54 second voicemail would be such a big deal. I imagine if everybody played back the voicemails sorry exes left it would make for very interesting listening. But hey it’s Adele, and she sang it.
Then I heard Omawumi’s version, with the reggaeton twist added to it and I thought damn! If my ex left THIS on my voicemail I just might….nah!
Secondly and important to me because somehow I fancy myself a writer, I marveled at the simplicity of the lyrics of the song and Adele’s ability to stir very deep emotions with such simple words. They weren’t complicated, no complex rhyme schemes or double layered meanings or imagery. Just heartfelt. Exactly how a voicemail will sound (even if your ex is threatening to key your car and scratch your face out in said voicemail. You just KNOW that threat is heartfelt)
Just like that another year is gone. For the single pringu (bearded, because apparently it’s only for the guys with beards) guys and ladies (smooth-faced please, no bearded ladies abeg), I hear #SiezeTheBae2015 is still in effect. Avail yourself of the opportunity to enter 2016 with your bae and boo respectively. And for those in relationships, most especially those who suspect they are dating or are ACTUALLY dating Yoruba/Igbo demons, #CommitOrCommot2016 has started. You know what to do.
Now for those single pringu who are not bearded but have goatees like yours sincerely, please babes have mercy on us. Edakun. It’s a genetic something, we know you want beards but we can’t just grow it like grass like that. We are trying; don’t judge the book by the cover.
On a final note…
Big news. I know this year has been very sketchy in terms of my consistency with posts. Blame it on University of Ibadan; they want to kill somebody with work. It’s not a joking sturvs.
That said, Musings of a Mild Insomniac is expanding this month and next year by the grace of God. So if you are interested in contributing you can reach me @arielugorji or by mail; email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
Also yours sincerely will be running a new feature column where I hope to put a spotlight on the young insomniacs out there staying up late to build their hustle. So if your hustle has been keeping you awake and it’s unique, hit me up and be ready to answer my questions (hehehe). Seriously though, hit me up. It’s free publicity (for now).
Finally if you need more of my weirdness check out Losbeauty.com. I have a running column titled “Average Jane” filled with stuff you’ve never read me discuss on my blog. Besides you could do a lot worse than Losbeauty.com when you need the best on fashion and lifestyle.
It’s been real